The First Day of the Rest of My Life

When I decided to have the gastric surgery, I thought that was the best decision I'd ever made, which it was, aside from marrying my husband..but I assumed all the wrong things about the effort I'd have to put into it. I was under the impression that the surgery alone would get rid of most of my excess body weight and I'd just start exercising when it became more comfortable for me to do so and if anyone asked why I wasn't exercising I could just use the surgery as an excuse. I have been putting in zero effort to aid in my own weight loss I'm starting to let myself think I didn't deserve to have the surgery in the first place... I thought it would be so much easier! WRONG! I couldn't have been more wrong. Now here I am 1 day shy of 2 months out and I realize that the time frame for the surgery to work it's hardest is only 3 months and I have completely wasted the first 2 of them by being lazy! I'm so angry with myself!

I had my nutrition follow up appt today and she reminded me that the surgery is only a tool to assist those who have trouble maintaining a healthy weight and it is not to be taken lightly! I made that exact mistake and I gave myself one reason/excuse after another until I arrived here and now I can't go back and do it differently. All I can do is be better each and every day from here on out.

So with that being said, here are a few things I'm going to start doing to hold myself accountable to y'all and to myself;

1. I'm going to post a daily screenshot of my workout or steps for the day and get as close to 10,000 as possible.

2. I'm going to start going to Zumba class at my church twice a week (should be Wednesday and Friday) for which there will not be a screenshot because I won't have my phone on me during Zumba so I will post a picture of myself after the class AT the church!

3. I'm going to make a schedule for a daily cleaning routine and I will try to not allow myself to sit down and watch tv until the checklist for the day is done, except on laundry day where I use the living room to fold clothes which for that day, I will set a timer for the tv and if I take longer than 2 hours to fold the clothes I have to finish it with no tv.

4. I'm going to schedule my walk for first thing in the morning so that the kids are still sleeping and I get my me time and I can be done before breakfast.

I'm hoping that these 4 basic rules that I'm going to set myself to will help make the very most of this 3rd month and all the months after that. So far, as of today, I have lost a total of 31 pounds. The 3 month goal or expectations is 50 pounds. I don't think I'll be too far behind if I don't change anything but I refuse to be a failure story! I want my story to be one of success and happiness and I honestly want to challenge myself to see just how much I can loose in 1 month!!

I have told myself every day since the 17th of May that I shouldn't push myself to the point of being uncomfortable because in all honesty, I'm scared. I'm scared that I no longer know my body's limitations and that if I push myself too hard I could do major permanent damage. The reality of all that is, fear is a liar! Fear is nothing more than the devil trying to hold me back. He don't want me to succeed and he wants to see me fail because that's what makes him happy, knowing that I was unable to put all my trust and all my faith in God and ultimately failed.

You ever notice how it seems like the kids around you (your kids, nephews, nieces, cousins, etc.) have 3 or 4 birthdays before you have 1? It seems lile they are growing up so fast and you are just sitting still..but honestly, your time is running just as fast as theirs. The only difference is what you're doing with your time. The kids change activities and sports with each season. They look older each year because they are growing and changing so quickly.. and you, you're doing the same old thing every day because that's what adulthood has become for so many people. Get up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, get ready for bed and then do it all over again. Then when the weekend comes, you spend all day Saturday trying to decide something to do and then when you decide, it's too late so you say you'll do it tomorrow after church but then by Sunday night, you realize you've wasted all weekend and now you have to go back to work. But it don't have to be like that! You can be just as adventurous and ever changing as the kids around you! You just have to put in the effort!

I'm going to strive to try as many new things as possible this year and see how I feel about my life at my 1 year post op mark!

If anyone you know is struggling with this, I encourage you to talk to them about it because that's what my husband has been trying to do for me and I finally believe it and I am ready to start the first day of the rest of my life tomorrow at exactly 2 months after my surgery!

Also, if anyone has any other ideas or suggestions for self accountability, please comment or go to my Facebook page Couch to Fab and post them on there! I'll be sharing this entry on there as well!

Much love y'all!! Until next time (tomorrow!),

Kay